Sharing Resumes

It's job application season here at school which means a few things:

1. I have a major identity crisis, rethink my life, consider dropping out of school, am amazed by how quickly time passes, am exasperated by how slowly time passes, sweat, cry, cheer, and eventually decide that I have made nothing but fantastic career decisions over the past few years.
2. I browse through the placement listings only in cool places, even if that means missing out on jobs that might be awesome for me. I am not a small town girl. (So for I have applied for jobs in Toronto, Ottawa, San Francisco, San Antonio, Seattle, London, Toyko, and Christchurch, New Zealand)
   
3. People want to swap resumes for peer critique.

While I am more than happy to give feedback on somebody else's resume if they really want it, I don't like showing my resume to people.

I guess I just think that resumes are a way of presenting yourself, and I'm not really looking for input on how to do that. I guess having a proofreader might be necessary to check for grammar or spelling errors, but beyond that I'm not really interested in hearing that somebody thinks it's too personal, or too long, or too much white space (or not enough, etc).

Due to the nature of my school's job application system, resumes are viewed in html. So I put some hyperlinks in there because why not! I also have a section called interests and activities (or something semi-lame) and I mention sports and improv because if people don't like sports and improv, I don't want them to hire me anyway. That sounds sort of cocky, and maybe I am.

Actually, getting a little more honest, I think I just feel pretty confident about my resume, and don't want to subject myself to hearing anything that might lower my confidence in something I've worked so hard to perfect.

So what I'm saying is: Dear Everybody. Let's stop trading resumes. Love Lisa.

Word Time in the tent

You know that Flickr: Word Time thing that's so popular with all the crazy internet kids these days? Well, when I was home a week ago, Jack watched every single one with Laura, and was really excited to film himself. (More importantly, to watch himself. He's vain in an adorable way)

In this first video, Jack reiterates a bunch of words used in previous weeks on Word Time. (Rob also joins in halfway through.) I think Jack didn't really get it. I think he understood it to be a game of making up accents. No Jack, people actually talk like that.


Our accent from Lisa on Vimeo.

Then we got the whole gang in the tent and did last week's words. I got a little stage fright when I saw the word About... because I didn't want to mess it up for Canada. Everybody thinks Canadians say "aboot," and I wanted to represent my national well.


Week 4 Words from Lisa on Vimeo.

I think my most recent visit home marked my realization that it's not just Jack who is the funny boy in the family. Robbie is hilarious in a way more subtle way.

Here's an excerpt from an email he recently sent me:

I had three soccer games in the first one we lost 3-1 in the second we lost 9-0 but guess what in last game it was 8-1. For the other team.

What a joker. I'm having Rob and Jenny stay with me for a week later in the summer and I kind of can't wait.

Problem Set 1

(Click here to enlarge)

The first page of a brand new notebook for the first problem set for the term.

I've got to say... when I graduate? This right here is what I'll miss most.

LFar and the local bike shop

I'm pretty interested in bike maintenance.

Okay, full disclosure because my sisters are probably going to accuse me of being a poser (they always do that, and it's kind of good because it makes me be honest but it's also annoying because I have to provide caveats to 50% of the statements I make around them), so full disclosure: I am INTERESTED in bike maintenance. Not "I am terrific at it" or "I am vastly knowledgeable" but, "I am interested."

So my lovely mountain bike (which needs a name, yikes!) kind of had a rusty chain (I rode it in the winter) plus it was making a weird noise upon rotation of the front wheel (out of true?) so I decided to take it into the local bike shop.

First things first. 90% of all bike shop employees are incredibly attractive. It's a universally accepted fact. Am I right? So here is the conversation that went on in my head:

My socially acceptable side: So um, let's shower, hey? You haven't showered since yesterday morning
My rational side: UHHHH BUT IT TAKES SO LOOONG.

SA side: Well, okay. Maybe do something to that hair? It's literally bed head.
R side: Quest-ion-nay... what are you suggesting?

SA: mmm, maybe a quick brush, or -
R: or a headband? WHATEVA.

SA: Okay, um, how do you feel make up. A touch of bronzer? You're especially pale since you're sick.
R: Nay can do. It makes my face look dirty.

SA: please brush your teeth at least
R: jjake.

(Slowly yet surely, my two halves turn out to be Jake and Amir)

So I get to the bike shop. Everybody is hunky, as expected. I try to kind of show off, but conversation tends to go this way:

Me: So uh, not sure if this is an acronym or a word because I've only seen it used in IM, but.. "S.R.A.M"? is the brand I want?
Bike Shop Boy: Sram.

Me: Yes, correct. Sram. Always seems to be written in capitals, hey? Heh-heh. Sooo the 900 series? Like uh, the 910 or something? Solid links?
BSB: Your bike has 8 gears in the back. I think you want an 800 series.

Me: Ah, correct again. An 800 series will do just fine.

So that guy gets to work on my front wheel, and I strike up a conversation with another employee. We talk for a bit about different types of chains. He uses the term "nickel-plated" and I ask what that means, he nicely explains. He later uses the term "heat treated" and is about to explain what that means but I haughtily interject that I know what heat treatment is.

Regretting my interjection, I change the topic to degreasers. Things are going fine until,

Me: ... and then I'll scrub down the cassette with degreaser, then just-
-a hesitation-
Him: lube it up?
-a really weird and awkwardly prolonged eye contact-
Me: right. Well I'll just take this one then. Gotta go.

I don't know how it suddenly got so awkward. He probably didn't even notice that I got awkward. Why do I make everything awkward? I think I've spend 30% of my social life being slightly uncomfortable.

Anyway, what I'm saying is that I got home, scrubbed and re-lubricated my gears, and it was really fun. The end.

Living the dream

Yesterday I had to go to the on-campus clinic to get my throat looked at. It was the most quintessential "university life" experience that I've ever had.

The hallways of the health services building are blanketed by bulletin boards annoucing various health facts that students should know. While waiting to see the urgent care nurse I learned all about nutrition, and almost picked up a brochure called 101 Health Breakfast Ideas because... 101? Okay so there's maybe like 40 types of cereal, and 10 ways to make eggs. That's only halfway! I guess you can make combinations and permutations out of inclusions of bacon, sausage, and ham. But still. 101?

While waiting to see the doctor I learned all about tattoos and genital herpes. They shared a wall. I'm not sure why. They always use such attractive people in the posters about genital herpes.

While waiting to get my lab results, I learned all about underage drinking. A big poster asked me If I Knew.... That some people feel like they have to drink to be cool? That it's okay to say no if you'd rather do homework? Real friends will respect your decisions.

In addition to these posters, I also got a talk from the doctor upon being prescribed penicillin ("it can reduce the effectiveness of oral contraceptives!" "got it." "NO REALLY, IT CAN") An abbreviated version of the conversation goes somewhat like this:

Doc: So you should inform any of your sexual partners over the past week that you have strep throat
Me: That list has zero people on it
Doc:... Okay. Well.... you know, if there were...
Me: No sweat, doc...

I think my favourite part of the day was getting my prescription at the pharmacy next door. Student Coverage is pretty great... it cost me 62 cents! What?

Party like it's 1999

I'm having a party on Friday with the theme of "1999". Basically I except to see lots of people wearing Northern Getaway, karma beads, Baby G watches, B.U.M equipment, tapered leg jeans, references to Napster, tear away pants, butterfly clips, etc.

So we have to make an awesome play list, right?

So far, the plants include:

• early Brit Brit
• Shania Twain
• Eiffle 65
• BSB
• Spice Girls (later stuff)
• Early Justin Timberlake
• Enrique
• Aaron Carter
• Prozac
  
• S Club
• Brian McKnight
• Venga Boys
• Eminem
• Pearl Jam
  
• Hanson
• The Moffats
• 98 Degrees
• Savage Garden
• The Verve
• Offspring
• Some Green Day
• Some BNL
• Usher
• Nelly
• Puff Daddy
• early Jay-Z
• Notorious B.I.G
• early Daft Punk
• No Doubt
• OTown
• B44
• Shaggy
• TLC
• Aqua
• Vitamin C
• some Red Hot Chilis
• Smashing Pumpkins
• Beastie Boys
• Sublime
• early Avril
• Trebel Charger

That list makes me incredi-nostalgic.

What else were you listening to almost 10 years ago?

No Bad Habits!

Jack and Laura made a fort in the family room this weekend. Jack decided there needed to be some rules. Well, one rule, really: No Bad Habits.

He made this sign:
and I interviewed him for more information:

Bad Habits from Lisa on Vimeo.

Stay tuned for more tent videos!

Young at Heart: movie review

I saw the movie Young at Heart earlier this week.

You have to see it. I cried twice and spend the rest of the time being so happy that I emitted little giggles here and there.



You're going to fall in love with every single chorus member.

Just so so so so so wonderful.

Like seriously, watch this music video:


Now find out where it's playing near you and go watch it!

The results are in!

My dad and I came 8 of 26th (2 person co-ed teams). Pretty good, hey?

I love this picture. Four years of war canoe paid off: I was the only person on the lake with form that intense. I'm not sure if I should be proud or embarrassed.

Storm the Trent: race report

On Saturday I did an adventure race with my dad.I like my dad, and I bet you would, too.

The race was four hours long (from 1pm to 5pm). For every MINUTE you were late, you were deducted 10 points. There were two mandatory checkpoints (one on bike, one by canoe) and 12 optional checkpoints where you could gather points.

So we started with a quick 15-20 minute run, to break the bike start up, and then we set out on our bikes. Now, I'm not a super fast biker. It's definitely my worst triathlon event, and that's saying a lot considering a rescue boat once tried to come save me during the swim portion of a triathlon. But I've been going to a lot of spin class, and doing a lot of leg focussed weight lifting, so I'd like to think I've improved.

Well, I was rocking on the bike. I was just pounding the trails. Punishing the hills for ever existing. But my dad was being super slow! I was trying to be encouraging ("Lookin' good, let's get that stroke rate up") but eventually turned to saying things like, "just do it, 20 more minutes, push!" He was having trouble with his gears, too. Eventually we switched bikes and I discovered that his saddle was like, 2 inches too short. For me. And he's about half a foot taller than I am. In addition, something was majorly messed up with his derailer, and so I had to fix the chain by hand and then ride the rest in one gear. So then he starting creaming me... turns out I'm not that fast, my dad was just on a terribly out of tune bike. Darn.

So on the bike we stopped at 1 checkpoint worth 40 points, and 1 worth 20 points. We got to the transition area at a little after 3, thinking two full hours would be plenty of time to canoe out, visit some running check points, and canoe back. You know, a canoe portion should only be about 20 minutes each way, right?

Wrong. It was 55 minutes each way. So basically we canoed our hearts out for almost two hours, since as soon as we arrived at the checkpoint we had to turn around to make it back for 5pm.

We made it back with a few minutes to spare, but seriously hardly anybody else did. The results aren't up and we had to skip the awards ceremony, but even though we only visited two of twelve check points, we're hoping that other teams lost enough late points that we might have done alright.

So it was a great day with my dad over all. Unfortunately, it was supposed to be cold so I wore a long sleeve shirt with no sunscreen. But then it was warm so I took the long sleeve shirt off and this is what happened:Aye Carumba. The burn is way less now, but I'm going to have a fantastic tan line for the rest of the summer, I bet.

On Sunday I was incredibly sore, but did that stop me from playing two back to back soccer games? No sir!

So on Monday I was INCREDIBLY sore (I hadn't played soccer in a while), but did that stop me from sprinting out on my bike to buy more printer ink to print a report that was due that afternoon? I wish!

Moral of the story. Stretch. And wear sunscreen.

You know that girl that leaves kitchen cupboards open, doesn't replace empty toilet paper rolls, and always leaves time left on the microwave timer instead of clearing it?

That girl is me. Deal with it.

The accuracy of Compare People

So, Compare People is hilarious. I mean, it's just a hilarious concept. You anonymously compare two friends on questions like "who can drink more?" and "who is more likely to do a favour for me?"

It's funny to see how people have rated me. I get to discover things like 4 people think I'm prettier than one of their friends, but only 2 think I'm hotter. 14 people would choose to take me shopping, and 4 people chose somebody else to kiss. I've never "lost" head-to-head on funnier or more tech-savvy or rather marry, but I've never "won" more loyal or more naturally talented.

Here's the zinger, though. Of all my friends on facebook (like, 600 or something unrealistic), I'm rated the 2nd best potential mother.

Best potential mother? Where were all these voters for "better taste in music"? HMM? I'm 219th for better taste in music but 2nd for best potential mother! 141th more cuddly? I love cuddling!

And then I check out my competition. With a few exceptions, most other "best potential mothers" are the demure large-bosomed type. Why have my friends been voting me as best potential mother?

Just because I'm physically unable to suppress an AWWW when a friend in my class tells me about his 3 week old daughter, doesn't mean I'll be a great potential mother. It just means I like children. The two hardly go hand in hand.

Reasons why next time you're comparing people on Compare People you should not vote for me:

• I'm going to give my kids terrible names like Gretchen and Ivy. Deal with it.
  
• If I have more than one kid, I'll have a favourite (whoever is best at math and sports)
• I'll let them eat ice cream for dinner (hey, if I'm doing it, so can they)
  

For those still unconvinced, let me direct you to poor sisterhood examples here, here, here and here.

(I'm really not that upset about being voted 2nd best potential mother. I'm probably taking out my anger at being only 105th best at science. Seriously, people? I'm FANTASTIC at science! COME ON)

Unforgivable Shortcomings #1

New series!

Unforgivable shortcomings is a list of things I have trouble tolerating. I hope it doesn't get too whiny (let me know if it does)

Bad feet and ugly toes are one thing, but it's hardly your fault if your toes are weird lengths and hey, even I wear orthodics! I'm hardly going to judge you for poor gait.

But come on, long toe nails?

Unforgivable shortcoming #1: Long toenails.

There's just no excuse.

(Hilarious side note: looking for a picture to accompany this post showed me things I never wanted to see. Foot fetishes are WEIRD)

Piercings

To accessorize sufficiently for Laura's wedding, I have considering getting my ears pierced.

I never really wanted pierced ears when I was a kid, because I played soccer year-round and you'd have to tape up your ears during the can't-take-the-studs-out period. Wasn't worth the effort, really.

Now I only play contact sports recreationally during the summer, so it would be a great time to get the holes done. But like, it's $30 or something and I'd way rather buy half a lululemon shirt, or, I don't know, fresh vegetables. Plus then I'd start spending money whenever I saw cool earrings on sale. You know, like how I sometimes buy on sale necklaces, but never ever wear them? I seriously never wear any jewelery so getting my ears pierced would be a giant waste of money, am I right?

It's by other sister's 17th birthday today, and she really wants to get her nose pierced.

I'd make fun of her, except we all know I went through a period when I really wanted my nose pierced as well. I think I was about 19. Luckily Laura talked me out of it by pointing out that with only a few small exceptions, most people I knew with pierced noses were annoying and not intelligent. Sigh, you're right. I didn't get my nose pierced because looking intelligent is second only to being intelligent on my list of Things I Want People To Know About Me. And now I'm super glad I never got it done.

Other things I've considered getting pierced: eyebrow (except then apparently the skin starts to sag after a while. Uncool. Plus it'd be so hard to tweeze around there, then!), lip (but it'd mess up my teeth and I love my teeth), top of my ear, on the cartilage (but Laura already did that, and I don't want to copy. Plus, it requires a small amount of maintenance)

So I guess I'll just remain unpierced. Maybs I should get a tattoo or something, just to feel a bit bad-ass. But AS IF I could ever decide what to get.

Your views on pierced ears?