What I had for lunch: Monday

Stale Raisin Bran or non-delicious flavours of non-delicious instant oatmeal. Choose your breakfast.

I nicely suggested to my mom that we stock up our cereal cupboard a tad more. She gave me a harrumph and a "take it or leave it" and nicely suggested that I go buy my own cereal if I'm suddenly so picky.

I am much better at accepting other people's suggestions than my mom is, clearly, so yesterday while walking home from the gym I stopped at a local grocery store.

I could wax infinitely on the pleasures of grocery shopping in the suburbs. I love the wide aisles! The heaping bushels of fruit! The self check outs! (those are still fun) It seems in my pleasure of living at home and having somebody else do the cooking and shopping (Dear Mom. You're the Best. Love Lisa) I've forgotten about the pains of grocery shopping.

Namely: huge sales.

Now come on. The store is already called "No Frills". This store's raison d'etre is to be inexpensive and yet, all too frequently if you ask me, it has these liquidation-reminiscent $1 blow out sales where they choose 20 random items and mark their price down by anywhere from 50 cents to two dollars so that shoppers can now fill their cart with limit-6-per-family one dollar items like Michaelina's or store brand cellophane.

With ridiculous sales comes giant crowds. With giant crowds comes screaming babies. With screaming babies comes people eager to get the heck out of here. With people eager to get the heck out of here comes pushing, line cutting, and disregard for the "8 items or less" sign at the express checkout.

A quick peak at the checkout lines told me I'd be waiting 20 minutes to pay anyway, so I might as well shop around for a bit and get more than just a box of Mini-Wheats (they have 24% of your daily fibre. Who knew?). I followed the crowds: a fervent huddle around the dairy pointed out a great yogurt sale. A spirited, bustling swarm in the cookie aisle directed me to my favorite cookies, half off (aptly named The Decadent). A trail of blood and the sound of dejected groans lead me to the frozen foods section.. but all the bagel bite mini pizzas where already gone.

I then marched to the express lane and pointedly remarked to nobody in particular that this was the EIGHT ITEMS OR LESS CHECKOUT AISLE and promptly three people ahead of me will full carts suddenly remembered that they forgot alleged green peppers for the alleged salad tonight, allegedly (there was much less sheepishness than I would have liked to see) and I zipped through the check out in no time at all. (Though I would like to point out that they accepted only Mastercard, not Visa. What? Who? Why? Nonsense.)

When I got home I talked a lot about how my bowels are distraught because I refuse to eat stale raisin bran, and oatmeal and next to no fibre. I loudly lamented my desire to increase my daily fibre consumption, and what a shame, shame, shame it is that I had to walk allll the way to the grocery store just to buy some Mini-Wheats (I did not mention that I was passing by on my way home from the gym).

Perhaps due to my lamenting, or maybe because she's just a nice mom after all, this morning I discovered she had made me a kielbasa sub for lunch today. So delicious.

I also will eat 9 cookies (3 and counting). I packed them in 3 separate Ziploc bags of 3 so the people I sit with wouldn't see the stack of 9 and be all "Lisa eats 9 cookies a day" but really I do. I considered bringing some yogurt but decided against it due to too much clean up. (Seriously, bringing a Tupperware all the way to work and all the way home? And carrying it all the way to the dishwasher? Good luck.)

So lunch today: kielbasa sub, 9 cookies (shut up. You would too if they were on sale), an apple and an orange.