Chairlift memories

It's no secret that sometimes I'm the ringleader of the immature parade.

I'm a very fun person to ride with on the chairlift. As a youngster, my dad taught me how to clank my skis together at exactly the right moment as to dump snow down the neck of some innocent bystander below. We also used to play a game where, when we saw somebody that looked like they were about to fall, we'd make gun hands and pow pow* noises and if/when they'd eventually fall, we'd high five about it.

*Be careful not to get too slobbery in your sound effects. You are, after all, in freezing weather. Lesson learned.

Last weekend I went snowboarding with my family. As to be expected, we eventually split up into groups. At this point in the night, Rob and I were together; the chairlifts are for four people, so we joined up with another twosome.

Matt and Kieran were their names, it turns out. They were probably the most talkative people I have ever met. They, like Rob, were third graders.

"What grade are you in?" they asked me.

"Eight," I said. Then, "not really. I'm not in a grade. I'm old"

"Oh." they sighed.

"I have slime in my pocket. Want to see it?" asked Matt

They showed it too me and I said it was really cool. They told me about how they added smell powder to the first batch but it stunk up their dad's car, so they had to throw it out. I asked where they got it.

"The book order," explained Kieran

"Scholastic?" I queried. (Note how cool I am: I know about book orders)

"YES!" they enthused.

"For $20!" furthered Matt

"$19.99, Matt," corrected Kieran

"Yeah Matt, I think you mean $19.99" I chirped.

At one point the chairlift passes over the starting point of the only double black diamond slope. It's called Nosedive and Laura can tell you a story of a wipe out so bad that she not only got both skis knocked off, but her gloves, too. I think her coat somehow got unzipped and I know for certain that her ponytail elastic somehow came out. It was quite a wipe out.

I told the tale to Matt and Kieran and my cool status was upped even more. The hill that leads to Nosedive also leads to an easier, blue square run called Boomerang. Matt and Kieran told me they usually boo the people who go down Boomerang, and tell them to go down Nosedive. I liked this idea, and together we booed a small seven year old who was headed to Boomerang.

"YOU WIMP" shouted Matt.

"BOOOOOOOOO" booed Kieran.

"LIVE A LITTLE" I added.

Robbie giggled. He's so shy; it was the only sound he made during the whole ride. Other than, me: "My brother Rob is in grade 3, too!" them: "are you!?" Rob: "yeah."

We booed some more and then I taught them my gun trick. They liked it.

Just as we were about to get off ("Rob, Rob, is it tips up or down? I can't remember! Quick, tips up or down?" "Lisa. That's not funny anymore. It only makes Jack laugh") (It does make Jack laugh. It sends him into hysterics and I almost have to carry him off the lift.) the chair lift stopped.

At my suggestion, we all booed the old man in the chairlift operation hut, and gave him thumbs down. Even Rob.

I'm a wonderful role model- don't ever forget that.

All in all, this ranks as probably my favourite chairlift trip ever (runner up: my almost first kiss with my snowboard instructor. As with seemingly all my grade eleven memories, Britney's "Toxic" played in the background. I had just told him all about improv and he said that was really cool. He had just told me about how his friend almost got into a car crash and I said that sounded dangerous. Then he was helping me fix my binding. I felt pretty cool. But then the lift jerked to a stop and below us, one of his friends yelled out "HEY SAM!" and so Sam had a shouting conversation for a minute with his friend below. Then the chairlift restarted and the moment was gone. Alas.)